Rest assured, I have someone on the outside.

After V5’s crew came back from grabbing a meal outside, PPGOD—who had previously laughed at Xiao Tian for practicing new champions like a dog—could no longer muster even a single smile.

Patch 12.4.

A brand-new champion was added to the support role: Renata Glasc.

Given the invincible mechanics of Renata’s W and R abilities, it was entirely unsurprising that this creature would become a mandatory practice item for LPL supports.

Rookie couldn’t smile either.

While the new patch was nerfing a massive cluster of champions, Riot Games had also reworked Ahri. Ahri was already a champion with flawless mechanics, and this time, the designers went ahead and increased her damage.

Great.

The entire mid, bot, and support trio was forced into collective boot-camp training.

The first match after the Lunar New Year was against OMG, whom they had already faced back in the Demacia Cup. They were old rivals, and since V5 had managed to take them down during Demacia Cup, they naturally needed no introduction now that their team synergy had deepened even further for the Spring Split.

A lightning-fast victory.

The real focal point was the opponent right after that.

The V5 Avengers were about to clash with Rookie’s former home team, IG.

Things were about to get thoroughly chaotic.

During this period, IG was far from the irredeemable dumpster fire that everyone later imagined them to be. On paper, their roster still felt fiercely competitive, which prompted Rookie to crank up his training intensity to the absolute maximum the moment he learned who their next opponent was.

Let’s briefly review their lineup:

Top laner Zika. Throughout the entire S12 season, the LPL’s emerging generation of top laners only produced three notable names: one was OMG’s Mountain, one was TES’s Wayward, and the final one was none other than the present Zika. According to IG’s narrative, he was destined to be IG’s next TheShy.

Jungler Xun. Still a familiar ID—a high-pressure, clutch jungler who would even contend for the title of the best domestic active jungler by the year 2024, though his performance always carried a slightly reckless, gambler-like scent.

Mid laner Yuekai. A budget version of Knight, and practically the purest specimen among all RNG zealots. After spending three years as a bench warmer on RNG, he finally returned to IG as the reigning dragon ascending his throne. Considering his market value, his cost-performance ratio was quite decent.

The bottom lane felt somewhat hastily cobbled together: AHN plus Lucas. You just needed to know who they were.

Without a doubt.

The primary thing to guard against with this IG squad was their top-side map control, but the prevailing meta heavily favored the bottom side, which ultimately made IG’s overall performance throughout S12 extremely volatile.

"With this kind of lineup,"

"I feel like Chicken-ge is going to roll all over them in a few days anyway. Shouldn't I just be responsible for leaning back and getting carried?"

After reviewing IG’s player roster, Luo Ji immediately felt the urge to kick his feet up and slack off.

It just goes to show:

However exhilarating your cheeky, unorthodox strays were before the New Year, the boomerang would return to smack you just as hard on the competitive stage after the holiday.

Ever since he single-handedly birthed the Hullbreaker meta, the LPL stage had gone completely mad. Outlandish picks like Hullbreaker Quinn and Hullbreaker Vayne were crawling out of the woodwork everywhere.

No matter how insanely skilled he was.

When encountering opponents on stage who used ranged AD champions to bully melee ones, a deep, inescapable irritation would well up in his heart. Irelia had managed to ascend to mainstream status this patch due to the rework of Blade of the Ruined King, but the problem was that other teams hardly ever let him have Irelia.

Karsa shot him a fierce, sideways glare.

Seeing that he was actually soaking his feet late at night while grinding solo queue, his expression turned even stranger.

Are young people nowadays all this bizarre?

Words on his lips: *My heart is dead, I want to die, this is so annoying, it's driving me crazy.*

Actual behavior: *Soaking feet, health preservation, Baduanjin exercises, abstaining from alcohol and sugar.*

A lifestyle of absolute devastation.

"Old Song rarely has a competitive drive this fierce. Aren't you going to help him out?"

"You're already there, Ge, so you'll suffice. Just think about it: when we played against TES, Rookie went super-saiyan. So naturally, when we play IG, it's your turn to go super-saiyan."

"And what about you?"

"Me?"

Luo Ji pondered for a moment.

"How about I pop off when we play EDG instead? Bullying that old gun-user is absolute child's play for me."

"Keep bragging, go on."

While the two of them chatted, Luo Ji’s live broadcast stream was still running.

The entire LPL knew the exact situation between Rookie and IG. If V5 hadn't coincidentally prepared to launch a sweeping, ambitious restructuring project this year, Rookie might not have even found a team to play for in the S12 Spring Split.

Professional players understood how this worked.

If you sat out for a single season and then waited until the next, a team that originally wanted you might lose interest entirely after a mere split, or worse, brutally lowball your salary.

IG wasn't just stabbing Rookie in the back; they were outright cutting off the man's livelihood.

[V for Vendetta, time to initiate!]

[My Dream, stop holding back! Unleash your Flame Fist on IG!]

[Grand Unified Faction Theory: RA wins, the hype faction wins; WBG wins, the traitor faction wins; TES wins, the renegade faction wins. All we're missing is the substitute faction—TT, plus IG itself—and V5 can merge five souls into one to reclaim the orthodox throne!]

[Sweep IG and return to your true self!]

As one of the opening days for the Patch 12.4 release, viewer traffic on Luo Ji’s stream was soaring. Everyone wanted to learn some LP-gaining cheese, but alas, no matter how many times Luo Ji flipped through the patch logs and rummaged through the memories in his mind, he stubbornly couldn’t think of anything suitable to pull out in an official match.

"Let's do this."

"I'm not going to feed you guys a bunch of hollow nonsense. When we play IG, if the in-game situation permits, I’ll pull out another usable trick for everyone."

"Of course, provided that the situation allows for it, haha."

Recalling his previous matches.

He had either played against washed-up old-timers or unseasoned rookies completely devoid of form, or against Mountain and Aile, who hadn't possessed a shred of fighting spirit during the Demacia Cup. But tomorrow, he would suddenly run into Zika, whose form in his memory seemed fairly decent, and he couldn't quite gauge the opponent's true strength.

Upon hearing this.

The viewers in the stream chat grew completely ecstatic.

Meanwhile, at the other end of the camera lens, across the IG headquarters, the roster of players listening to Luo Ji’s words through the broadcast collectively turned and patted Zika on the shoulder with profound sympathy.

"Hold on, why us?"

"The club made the mistake—why do we players have to bear the consequences?"

"This isn't fair!"

Zika completely broke down.

By this point.

Luo Ji’s broadcast stream long ago transcended its own core fanbase; a good number of players and data analysts from other clubs were also dropping in to observe.

After all, the entertainment value was high, and the new patch offered plenty of novelties—copying homework was still learning, after all. But dammit, don't use new patch monstrosities to bully people!

Since when did patch scientists get to act so arrogant?!

"It's fine," Xun chimed in to comfort him.

"As long as he doesn't pull out something ridiculous like top-lane Smite Janna, any other tricks will at worst just be build-path cheese. Ultimately, it still comes down to the player's own mechanics and skill level. You have to believe in yourself!"

"And what if I can't beat him?"

"Then we're totally doomed."

"..."

A few days later.

When the V5 contingent walked back into the arena, Rookie had already learned through the boiling internet hype that Luo Ji intended to use an unorthodox cheese strategy to help him secure victory.

For a man.

Actions were often far more moving than any words could ever be.

It touched him so deeply.

He was practically ready to bow down to Luo Ji as Grand Commandant, induct him into the Grand Minister's hall, elevate him to General-in-Chief, Imperial Chancellor, Director of the Secretariat, Commander of the Capital Garrison, Regional Governor of Texas, Commander-in-Chief of All Military Affairs Within and Without, Grand Metropolitan Commander of Washington, Supreme Marching Commander of San Francisco, Regional Military Commissioner of North America, Pillar of the State, King of New York, holder of the imperial scepter and battle axe, permitted to enter court without quickening his pace, addressed by title rather than personal name, allowed to wear shoes and carry swords into the imperial throne room, recipient of the Nine Imperial Bestowals, wearer of the twelve-tasseled crown, granted the right to clear the roads upon departure and arrival, and driven in the golden-root chariot drawn by six imperial steeds.

[I'm back again~]

[I don't even need to watch today's match to know it's going all three full games.]

[It's true. Ever since they swapped Mebius into the top lane, V5 has been playing like they're fighting on planet M78—they always have to get beaten to the red-warning light before they unleash their beam to clear the stage. They simply won't win a game without wasting a few match points first.]

[Actually, IG's card pulls this year aren't bad either; both Zika and Xun have some real substance.]

[Regardless of anything else, IG really is like stars scattered across the sky when separated, but when gathered they form... form... the very first World Championship title ever!]

Before the match even commenced.

The barrage of bullet comments in the stream was already dense and frantic.

The memes for this match practically revolved entirely around Rookie, but unexpectedly, this particular day also happened to be Karsa’s birthday. Carrying these dual buffs meant that the V5 team was certainly not going to get away with slacking off today.

In the backstage lounge.

Luo Ji watched the coaches and analysts continuously brainwashing Rookie right in front of him, his expression struggling to maintain composure.

Were these people addicted to psychological conditioning?

When they did it to Xiao Tian, it was still "Thirty years east of the river, thirty years west of the river." Now, when brainwashing Rookie, they were already dropping lines like, "Our debt of grace is severed, our bond of righteousness is broken!"

With you guys giving Sanguosha this kind of free advertising, has Sanguosha ever paid you a single cent?

When asked if Luo Ji needed any of that treatment, Luo Ji shook his head decisively.

"I don't need it."

"Compared to psychological support, I've already found a much sturdier metaphysical support. Don't worry, I've got people on the outside."

"Metaphysics?"

NoFe and Zero exchanged a glance.

But seeing Luo Ji’s thoroughly mysterious expression, as if revealing the secret would make it lose its magic, they could only assume he truly had a trump card prepared.

Soon.

The match began.

The first round of bans naturally targeted the current patch monsters.

The 12.4 patch for the tournament realm had not yet gone live at this juncture; currently, 12.4 was only up on the PBE, and even the live servers wouldn't receive it until three days after the IG match. Therefore, the tournament was still played on Patch 12.2, and the drafting phase needed no introduction.

First round of picks:

IG: Twisted Fate, Aphelios, Thresh.

V5: Senna, Tahm Kench, Lee Sin.

The opening few picks were relatively standard. Entering the second phase, both teams began targeting the mid-lane champion pools, with LeBlanc and Corki both being escorted into the ban zone by IG.

Toward Rookie, their former mid-lane big brother, IG still held a heavy sense of reverence. Conversely, over on V5’s side, they only banned Xin Zhao, the one champion capable of going toe-to-toe with Lee Sin on equal terms.

Fourth pick, Rookie locked in Zoe.

Aside from his signature picks throughout S12—the two syndras, the two leblancs, and one chicken—Zoe was the champion he played the most. Her entry barrier wasn't excessively high, and her performance hinged primarily on whether her R-ability spell paddles landed accurately.

If inaccurate, she was absolute dead weight in team fights.

The final two picks.

IG fell into hesitation.

Zika had wanted to pick Tryndamere, but he had also caught wind of insider rumors that after Luo Ji popularized the Hullbreaker cheese strategy, he had been spamming Jax in the top lane to rack up massive amounts of LP.

If he picked Tryndamere, the opponent would most likely counter with Jax. After thinking it over, for their final two choices:

IG locked in Diana plus Renekton.

His logic was simple: the opponent was born in 2003, and he couldn't outplay him mechanically, so he would simply select a stat-check monster for the top lane.

He refused to believe it.

Once he locked in a stat-check brute like Renekton, what possible natural predators could there even be in the top lane?!

Immediately afterward.

The viewers watched as V5’s final selection in the counter-pick slot was revealed as the pristine, white-haired, beast-eared, twin-tailed perfection.

Zika: !!!

Casters: !!!

Stream Chat: !!!

[It's happening, it's happening! Teacher Big Dream's cheese is starting up again, I love this kind of stuff.]

[What do you do when cheese doesn't work against a stat-check monster? Simple: you just pick a hero who is even more of a stat-check monster than the stat-check monster itself!]

[I am Li Bai, scattering wine cups with a broken sword to add color to poetry.]

[Indeed. Using other champions to lane against Renekton makes my heart flutter with anxiety, but Volibear? As long as I apply persistence and hard work, sweat will automatically appear on the opponent's face.]

[When I first played Sylas, they said the champion was strong, not me; later I played Mordekaiser, still slaughtering everything in sight; I figured I should try an old champion, so I chose Volibear, and still won eight out of ten games. That was when I understood: it’s not the stats that are strong, the one who has always been strong is myself.]

What was Volibear?

A level-two execute threshold of over four hundred and seventy damage.

Throughout the entire league's top lane, there was not a single top laner as exaggerated as this, unless a level-two Tryndamere rolled critical hits on every single auto-attack.

Of course, the flaws were equally obvious.

Opponents would practically always step out of range for the second tier of his W, and his E had a painfully high cast delay. But the moment those two skills actually connected, the target would either die outright or lose half their life bar.

"Zika, I have some good news and some bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?" Xun looked at V5’s final pick and pondered for a long while before speaking.

"Let's hear the good news."

"The good news is that the opponent picked Volibear this game. His stats are so bloated that it probably has nothing to do with any cheesy strategy."

"And the bad news?"

"The opponent picked Volibear."

"..."

Zika plunged into silence once more.

In any other patch, a mere Volibear—if the enemy jungler came top one, two, three, four, or five times—would have no choice but to flatten himself against the floor.

But this patch was entirely about playing around the bottom side!

The top lane was nothing more than an isolated island. You expect him to pilot a Renekton against the absolute ceiling of stat-checking that is Volibear?

Emmm...

Zika was already contemplating whether he should just flat-out rush Anathema's Chains this game.

Ultimately:

IG: Top Renekton, Jungle Diana, Mid Twisted Fate, Bot Aphelios + Thresh.

V5: Top Volibear, Jungle Lee Sin, Mid Zoe, Bot Senna + Tahm Kench.

Did you think V5 only pulled out one stat-check monster this game?

Wrong, fool~!

Although Tahm Kench hadn't been nerfed on the tournament patch yet, precisely because he hadn't been nerfed, Tahm Kench playing in the bottom lane as a support remained an absolute stat-check monster.

With two major stat-check monsters guarding the side lanes for the team, Luo Ji honestly couldn't figure out how they were supposed to lose this match.

Level one.

Instead of hiding in the brush to scavenge experience, he walked right up to the lane in broad daylight. Volibear’s early-game laning phase was exceedingly simple.

Weave auto-attacks between your strikes, and let the stats do the talking.

Zika clearly didn't dare to brawl with Volibear in the early game. This white-haired, beast-eared, twin-tailed beast might look like it was specially tailored to counter domestic players, but in truth, it really was tailored to counter domestic players—at least, top-lane players generally found it hard in their hearts to refuse such a stat-heavy monster.

That was assuming you were the one picking it, though, and not the enemy.

Let's look at Luo Ji’s rune choices.

The Volibear this game didn't pick Grasp of the Undying; instead, he took Press the Attack, maximizing his offensive pressure, determined to play a pure stat-checking game against Renekton. His follow-up skill points were entirely traditional, secondary Resolve tree, starting Doran's Ring.

Fine.

Your stats are high, you're amazing, I'll just play safe.

Before the minion waves even reached the lane, Zika stood far in the distance and started spamming emotes.

Seeing this.

Luo Ji likewise began spamming emotes in response. As they exchanged animations, the two top laners kept inching closer and closer until they were virtually standing toe-to-toe, yet neither of them initiated an actual attack.

Here it comes!

The highest rite of passage for top laners on stage.

Equivalent to a knife-fight in Counter-Strike, a ATV solo in PUBG, a frying-pan duel in battle royale, flashing at the start of a League match to show goodwill, or fist-bumping in Apex Legends.

Unlike the scheming deception within Sanguosha, this was a pure, unadulterated expression of courtesy before violence, until the minion waves finally crashed and the two drifted apart once more.

"Well..."

"My Dream and Zika are something else. They haven't even started fighting yet, but they're already exchanging emotional pleasantries."

In the casting booth.

Caster Miller watched the scene unfold and couldn't help chuckling.

Given Luo Ji’s generous tributes to the broadcast streams, his self-awareness naturally drew the sidelong glances of the entire casting crew.

Such was society.

The most sophisticated interpersonal relationships often only required the most primitive forms of communication.

Therefore.

When Ai Lolii next to him asked Miller which team he favored more, Miller answered almost without hesitation:

"IG."

"Or rather, I am extremely optimistic about IG's top laner, Zika. I've been bullish on this rookie since the Demacia Cup; his performance throughout the entire S11 season made me feel somewhat incredible."

"I believe he will be the greatest variable for the IG squad."

Ai Lolii: ???

As a legendary caster whose opening blessings invariably caused keyboards to sprout milk and whose well-wishes for the nation instantly heralded disasters—earning him the prestigious title of locking down the entire national populace for three years—

Caster Miller’s potent jinx directly left Ai Lolii utterly speechless. The viewers in the stream were similarly affected.

While utilitarian jinxing wasn't advisable, nobody ever claimed utilitarian jinxing lacked results. You're laying that jinx on way too thick, aren't you?!